EN
This study arises from the question as to how present‑day pastoration should grow closer to the modern family, how to read what a family experiences generally (pastoration principles) and how to respond to specific situations (pastoration imperatives). The study answers this basic question as follows: What does the requirement of completely new pastoral competence in regular church ministry of a family mean in comparison with the past? The study answers with several theses: a) abandon the institutionalized and canonically formalized manners that the Church formulated theoretically and practically 150 years ago as the only possible means; b) abandon strategies based on objective norms in individual lives; c) offer more differentiated usages of the graduality principle. This strategy includes the initiation of a pastoration course of gradual growth, responsible discerning in individual cases (accepting status of penitents, developing dynamics of discerning in non‑sacramental pastoration, organizing of past life, guiding into a new type of communication with God, prayer that discerns, accepting the state of discerning and basic life orientation in Christ, maturing of conscience in communication with God´s word) and deeper integration into the Body of Christ (non‑sacramental, eventually sacramental, integration into the Church community).