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PL
Transition to parenthood is a vulnerable period for spouses and can consequently lead to the disintegration of their relationship. The purpose of this research was to examine the experience of this transition, circumstances and risk factors for divorce from the perspective of divorcees in Slovenia who divorced in the first year of their child’s life. On the basis of semi­‑structured interviews with 15 divorcees, the findings of studies examining changes after the birth of a child were confirmed. The results pointed to risk factors for marriage, such as uncertain relationship between spouses prior to the childbirth, permeable boundaries in relations with families of origin, lack of practical and emotional support, and unreal expectations. The child’s arrival accentuates unsolved issues from the past and brings additional vulnerability to the relationship. The findings of this research are a contribution to the development of preventive, educative and therapeutic programmes for couples in transition to parenthood.
EN
There are many models of the marriage in the Bible: marriage as covenant (e.g. Malachi), one flesh (Genesis), passionate love (Song of Songs), sometimes also utility of the wife for his husband (Proverbs) and legal satisfaction of the sexual desire (1 Cor 7). No one of these models leaves place for divorce. Covenant, unity of flesh and love exclude it: we can imagine a rupture of such a marriage, but not a legal divorce. Two other models could be perhaps harmonized with divorcing, but the Bible neither proposes to divorce a bad wife, nor allows abstaining from the marital life for ascetic motives. Next, what is generally overlooked, the marriage as presented in the Bible can be also explained by a metaphor of a (mutual) property (cf. Exod 20.17; Song 2.16; 6.3; Tob 7.12; Mark 10.11-12; 1 Cor 7.2-4; Eph 5.21). This model also excludes divorce (cf. 1 Cor 7.1-5,11-12), but also helps to explain biblical texts on the failures of marriages. Deut 24.1 refers to sending back a recently acquired wife when she is unfit for marriage (the case of repugnance). Hosea and Matt 5.32; 19.9 considers marriage with a prostitute impossible, apparently because she cannot be an exclusive property of her husband (the case of prostitution, incorrectly called “divorce clause”). The term “divorce”, derived from the Roman law, does not fit to such situations, interpreting them from the modern viewpoint. In the biblical translations and in the books on the Bible we should avoid it. We should talk about sending away, about impossibility of marriage, or about a nullity of marriage instead.
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