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This paper explores the parent’s experience of their child’s transition. I focus here on parents’ experiences of their trans* child’s coming-out, the emergence of ambivalent feelings of loss and remorse, and perceptions of themselves as ‘good parents’. For this research, a qualitative analysis of interviews with parents whose child identifies as trans* was conducted. The analysis suggests that, for some parents, the child’s coming out came as a surprise, while others perceived at an early age that their daughter or son was developing in a different way from what they considered to be the norm. The transition of a child is a challenging life situation for parents. They struggle to come to terms with the situation, often themselves experiencing the loss of the child’s original gender identity. Some find support online and seek out the advice of other parents in similar situations. Crucial to them, however, as this research shows, is their experience with doctors and psychologists and their satisfaction with their child’s diagnosis. Care for the child’s mental health and trusting the child’s own judgement appear to be key in the parents’ experience.
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